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Saturday, November 27, 2010

Talk to Me

People say that man isn't so much, but the way I see it, we're the only game in town. That's why we're lonley as a species. We're always looking for somebody to talk to. That's why we're shooting signals out into space, teaching gorillas sign language, and trying to create a robot that will . Why else would we bother? Maybe that's why God created us. Maybe He just got lonely.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Crackerjack


Crackerjack. Remember when they used to have actual prizes in there? A little magnifying lens? A tiny compass? Stuff  that might actually save your life if you were lost out in the wilderness. You know what's in there now? A piece of paper you fold over to show you Ben Franklin, or a 'pencil topper' which is another piece of paper with a picture of a ladybug on it to stick on top of a pencil. How does anyone live without one of those?
      I would have loved to have been in on that meeting..."Okay team, we've been put in charge of coming up with the next round of Crackerjack prizes, but all the prizes will have to be on paper."
"You mean you want us to write the ideas down?"
"No, I mean the prizes have to be made out of paper".
"That's not a prize. That's litter waiting to happen."
"Listen, having the words, " a prize in every box" on the box is a Crackerjack tradition, but our budget 
   for prizes this year is like, sixteen dollars, so we have to figure out how to work with that"
" Here's an idea: why don't we just not print that on the side of the box? Then, nobody gets their hopes up.We don't look like incredibly cheap bastards. Everybody wins!"
"Leave this meeting without a paper prize idea and you're fired."
"Pencil toppers...with um..ladybugs".

  Everything is so cheap because everybody's broke. Nobody's getting
to see Ben on the 100 dollar bill anymore. Might as well put him in Crackerjack.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

The Unbearable Lightness of Art

Some people think that snow sculpture and ice sculpture are pointless because soon after you put all this hard work into it, it melts and is gone forever. I think there is an even more fleeting art form, and that's music. As soon as the notes are beaten, blown, or plucked from an instrument, they're gone. Recordings, of course, capture the performance, much like photographs that conjure the memory of the bear that caught the fish that was carved from snow.
          

Monday, November 1, 2010

Why Do YouTube?

I always find it interesting when people say in their videos that they don't care anything about how many subscribers they have or how many views they get on their videos. It's interesting because it's a lie. Whoever says they don't care about being watched is either lying to you directly or lying indirectly. Posting a video and not caring if anyone sees it is like baking a batch of cookies, taking them out of the oven and over to the garbage disposal. You make something to be consumed by someone or someones.
           Of course you could bake a batch of oatmeal cookies and eat them all yourself, but then why upload them to YouTube? Just sit and watch them by yourself. The quality would be better anyway. Sorry, but when you upload you're saying, "I hope somebody sees this.." even if you can't admit it.